High Cognitive Empathy, Low Affective Empathy, and the Cost of Hyper-Consistency:  A Case Study of Social Reciprocity Exhaustion and Relationship Reset in an Adult with ASD Traits

This case study explores the experience of an adult with autistic spectrum traits who exhibits high cognitive empathy (ability to understand others’ intentions and social expectations) but struggles with affective empathy and real-time verbal reciprocity. The individual reports chronic exhaustion from continuously attempting to maintain “consistency” and balance in social relationships, ultimately leading to a major relationship reset in December 2025. Importantly, the decision to reduce or cut contact was not driven by dislike or resentment toward others, but by the unsustainable cognitive and energetic cost of maintaining reciprocal balance. Using Load Minimization Theory (LMT), this paper analyzes how hyper-consistency efforts lead to high energy expenditure (E) and eventual burnout, and how drastically reducing social obligations resulted in significant load reduction and improved well-being. Implications for self-understanding and neurodivergent communication styles are discussed.